Forgotten Book Friday: Naked Came The Manatee

“Naked Came The Manatee is a novel like no other; a wickedly funny Florida suspense thriller written serially by thirteen of the state’s most talented writers.” That quote is from the inside cover of the novel which was written in 1995 and 1996 as a serial for The Miami Herald’s Tropic magazine.

Dave Barry writes the opening chapter and Carl Hiaasen pens the final chapter. In between, the story is carried forward by Les Standiford, Paul Levine, Edna Buchanan, James W. Hall, Carolina Hospital, Evelyn Mayerson, Tananarive Due, Brian Antoni, Vicki Hendricks, John Dufresne, and Elmore Leonard, some of whom bring their previously existing characters into a mix that includes a 102-year-old environmentalist, a manatee named Booger, three severed heads, four murders, a smattering of sex and, oh yeah, both President Carter and Fidel Castro wander through the pages.

So if you want to laugh out loud while wondering how the authors were able to make all of this happen, grab a copy of Naked Came the Manatee, put your feet up and hours of your life will fly by.

To find other links to Forgotten Friday books, please visit She-Who-Started-It-All, Patti Abbott.

Terrie

A Celebration of Frank McCourt

On Friday, July 24, 2009, I attended "A Celebration of Frank McCourt," a tribute held at the Avram Theater on the campus of Stony Brook Southampton, during the Southampton Writers Conference. I had attended the Conference the past three summers, and was lucky enough to have been in Frank's Memoir Writing Workshop in 2007 (a future post will be forthcoming on that experience).

The latest edition of The Southampton Review (pictured here, the literary magazine published by Stony Brook Southampton MFA program in Literature and Creative Writing) honors Frank McCourt, who passed away on Sunday, July 19, 2009. Contributors to this special edition include: Alan Alda, Malachy McCourt, Alphie McCourt, Colum McCann, W.S. Merwin, and Roger Rosenblatt, and many others. This keepsake issue also contains several pieces written by Frank. Individual photos of Frank and each member of his 2007 Memoir Writing Workshop also grace the pages, of which I am one of the fortunate fourteen.

The evening featured remarks by friends, colleagues, students, and Frank’s youngest brother, Alphie McCourt.

Roger Rosenblatt said Frank was “the centerpiece of our writing program.” Bob Reeves said it is “impossible to overstate Frank’s importance to the MFA program,” and regarding Frank’s passing, “our hearts are broken.”

Alan Alda spoke about his experience of taking Frank’s workshop in 2005, along with actress Anne Bancroft; that Frank’s advice included trying to “find the hotspots” in one’s life to write a memoir. Alan said, “Frank was one of the hotspots of my life.” In conclusion, Alan said, “Wasn’t it glorious that we had him? ‘Twas.”

Laura Sillerman (who, along with her husband, Robert, generously host several authors during the conference each summer at their beachfront home) read a poem by Hafiz:

The small man

Builds cages for everyone

He

Knows.

While the Sage,

Who has to duck his head

When the moon is low,

Keeps dropping keys all night long

For the

Beautiful

Rowdy

Prisoners.

Laura said, “Frank was the dropper of keys for anyone who wanted to write; how lucky we were to be the rowdy prisoners of his charms.”

Matt Klam shared a story Frank once told about delivering a telegram to a nun when he worked for the Post Office at age fourteen. When she opened the door, he noticed lace knitting. He thought he would compliment her, so he asked if she knitted the lace herself. "Yes," the nun replied, "with these hands that never touched the flesh of man."

Poet Billy Collins said that one summer evening at the Sillermans, Frank was getting poetic about the sunset. Billy told Frank, “That’s my territory! I’m the poet here; forests, clouds, mountains, streams...you stick to your misery.”

Billy read two of his poems: "The Dead," and one of Frank’s favorites, “Afternoon with Irish Cows.”

Lou Ann Walker, the Editor-in-Chief of The Southampton Review, spoke of how colleagues, students, family and friends of Frank's prepared pieces in a short time frame to create this special issue to honor Frank. "Anything for Frank," they responded.

Alphie McCourt (pictured on stage) shared heartfelt personal stories about his oldest brother, and remarked, “So many heroes in movies and TV are named Frank,” and that “Frank was our hero.”

Meg Wolitzer, Ursula Hegi, Kaylie Jones, and Melissa Bank read excerpts from Angela’s Ashes. Susan Jane Gilman, Sande Berger, and Kathy Lynch read their contributions in The Southampton Review. Susan was a student of Frank’s at Stuyvesant High School who inspired her to become an author.

Regarding Frank’s storytelling, Colum McCann said, “Step into his stories and you don’t want to step out.”

Throughout the evening, we were treated to photographs, videos, and music celebrating Frank's life. One of my favorite clips was of Frank reading an excerpt from Angela’s Ashes (when at age fourteen, he got caught wearing his dead grandmother’s dress as he waited for his clothes to dry). Throughout the reading, Frank kept breaking up, laughing. I witnessed those precious moments when they occurred last summer; we howled right along with him.

Frank's beloved wife, Ellen, attended this special event, and I had the opportunity to express my condolences. We had met several times during the past two conferences. A heartwarming piece by Jim Dwyer appeared in the New York Times on July 26, 2009, featuring how Ellen met Frank and her role in persuading Frank to write Angela's Ashes. My heart goes out to Ellen, the entire McCourt clan, his "family" at Stony Brook Southampton, his friends, students, and the millions of fans around the world who adored him.

If you are interested in obtaining a copy of the Frank McCourt tribute issue of The Southampton Review, you can order one here.

And the Winners Are...

TaDa! Hoozah! Hooray! Congratulations to the five lucky winners of Martina Cole's "Faces"! I must say, I wish I could send prizes to all of the people who entered this contest, because I've never seen such great stories! About county fair wins, no less! (If you haven't had a chance to read them, check out the comments at: http://www.womenofmystery.net/2009/07/step-right-up-for-chance-to-win.html)

So...our real live winners (provided they get in touch and give me their addresses!) are:

Kaye
Barbara Martin
Janimar
Craven
Bag Lady

I'll need your snail mail addresses, guys. As long as I can figure out how to reach you, the publisher will be wrapping up your spanking new copy of Faces and sending it post haste! Please email me at lois.karlin [at] womenofmystery.net.

- Lois

Two for Tuesday: Almost Ready for Fiction

Image from Anne Mini's Author! Author!

This looks like a tidy, lovely place to have a nervous breakdown, that is to say, begin a new book-length MS. My dogs, I'm sure, would appreciate the chance to flip a coin for chair privileges though.

IF YOU HAVEN'T ENTERED THE RAFFLE TO WIN A FREE COPY OF MARTINA COLE'S NEW NOVEL FACES, YOU HAVE UNTIL NOON! HIE THEE HERE!

After finishing my recent short story, I ended up with a heaving pile of things needing to be looked at and worked over. My desk has to get clear and organized enough that I can be somewhat neglectful while I disappear into another hunk of work. The new one is my book-length...oh, I guess it's contemporary fantasy, but it's present-day with elements of scifi, too, plus history, suspense, and romance. Well, it will be if I do it right. Is there a marketing niche for kitchen-sink fiction. Didn't think so. That's what makes it stupid (or brilliant!)

Anyway, before that big, boring slog, I'm doing more research and housekeeping. Here's something from Unearthing Ancient America: The Lost Sagas of Conquerors, Castaways, and Scoundrels, edited by Frank Jacob-

In the stillness of Cockaponset State Forest, southern Connecticut, near the town of Guilford, masterfully carved from solid rock, stands North America's oldest Christian Church. Recent epigraphic evidence found here suggests that it is 1,500 years old and linked to a voyage of Christian Byzantine monks who fled from North Africa during the fifth century, in the wake of Vandal invasions.

What I wrote is for a Brazilian specialty coffee importer (free coffee is my ultimate job "perk"): It costs nothing to producers except adherence to standards that make us all feel better about the coffee we’re drinking and the beneficially transformative effects it can have on the communities and environments where it’s grown. We think sustainable coffee tastes better, too.

Soon there will be fiction, a veritable firehose of inky wretchedness splattering the nearby environs without heed for quality or sanity. But that's later this week. If you're not vacationing in these dog days, what are you up to?

Update: Leah J. Utas has been visited by the bluebirds of philosophical perspective.

Leave two sentences you've read and/or written in the comments or tell us where to find them!

Notice To Our Canadian Blogpals

We at Women of Mystery are based in the New York metro and upstate areas, and enjoy the online interchange with people across the U.S. and with our wonderful neighbors to the north.

Well, in breaking news, I've just learned that Manhattan now has an influx of 9 brand new Tim Horton's. There's no excuse not to come-a-callin' now.

P.S. Per the article, I read good things about the cruller. I see they also have wraps, salads, and yogurt smoothies. Don't bother me with those unless they're exceptional. What I want are recommendations of the puffy hot-dough variety for the next time I find myself in midtown with a hankering to discover the northern magic of Timmie's.

MTM: TOYS R US Times Square

When I was a kid, we used to sneak on the subway to hang out in Times Square. It was a place of glorious squalor. Oh, the Broadway theaters were there with their bright lights and big stars. But West 42nd Street, aka, The Deuce was a long row of porno movies and the entire area was littered with single room occupancy tenements called SROs occupied by people that the theater goers pretended not to see.

As city kids, we were wise to the ways of The Deuce. Every three feet someone was selling contraband: a little smack, fake identification, weapons, sex. If you can think of it, it was for sale. There was lots of stealing and street scuffles galore, with the occasional bloody street brawl drawing cops from every corner of the Square. It was all very cool and Panic in Needle Park-ish. We loved the atmosphere and roamed Times Square every chance we got.

My how things have changed. The porno theaters and SROs are long gone. Disney extravaganzas light the marquees of The Great White Way.

While fake IDs are still a thriving business, drugs, weapons and sex sales have largely moved elsewhere, or are peddled so discreetly as to go unnoticed by all but the most practiced eye. The star of Times Square is (and I never thought I’d live to see this day) TOYS R US, which takes up the entire north east corner of 44th Street and Broadway.

How many stores do you know that have a sixty-foot high ferris wheel inside the store?

Visitors can play with everything in the store including replicas of the Chrysler Building and the Statue of Liberty made from Lego pieces and the great dinosaur from Jurassic Park.

And did I mention Barbie’s Dollhouse or the R Zone filled with electronic games that you can play for free on huge plasma screens? Please do not miss the candy department on the third floor.

I’m glad that my grandkids will have the TOYS R US Times Square to remember when they are my age. Still there is nothing quite like the adventure of watching a drug deal go wrong in the middle of a snowy rush hour . . .

For more My Town Monday posts pop on over to the My Town Monday blog, where Clair Dickson will provide links from around the world.

******REMINDER******

You still have time to enter the raffle to win a copy of FACES by Martina Cole. Click here to read the blog post Lois put up last Wednesday and sign on for a chance to win!

Terrie

Great Stories In Our Faces Giveaway Comment Trail....

The challenge we posed for entries to our Faces raffle has elicited some weird and wonderful stories in the comment trail.

Get your entry in before Tuesday at noon. We love to read the stories, but you're not obliged to entertain..."just the facts mam" will do fine.

Many thanks to Susan Gottfried for her support of Women of Mystery. At www.westofmars.com you can click on her blog's Win-a-Book tab to read what what she has to say about our give-away and, well, about us! Her blog is a great place to connect with books and book lovers, plus she'll post something for you as long as it's on topic.

- Lois

August Classes for Hot Writers

We're fast approaching the halfway point of summer, when the temperatures peak and the days get extra lazy. If you're looking for something to occupy your mind, here's a sampling of online writing classes scheduled for August.

*Image courtesy of San Marcos Unified School District.

Writer University is offering three classes over the course of the month.

• "Making Your Children's Book More Marketable," Kate Coombs, August 2-28, $30. The author of a Parents' Choice Recommended Picture Book and an American Library Association Notable Book discusses how to take your manuscript to the next level while balancing your creative needs against market demands. The topics include where your book falls in today's market; targeting hidden obstacles that keep books from fulfilling their potential; strengthening character and plot; tightening text and brightening language; from irresistible beginnings to slam-bang endings; finding your spot and maximizing your voice; tips about submissions and publishers; and developing new children's book projects. Have ready at least one draft of your picture book or one chapter of your book for older readers, no matter how rough it might be.
  
• "Down and Dirty Media Training for Fiction Authors," Theresa Meyers, August 2-28, $30. Taught by a publicist known for getting her client's books picked for the Kelly Ripa Book Club, this month-long workshop teaches you how to get and make the most of interviews. You'll learn why media often don't want to interview fiction authors; how to change that with three strategies to hook producers and editors; keys to developing message points and using them successfully; tips on creating a sound bite; strategies to avoid unwanted questions; capturing audience attention; five things you should always do during an interview; and techniques used to prepare New York Times bestsellers for national media.
• Master Class: "Tune Up That First Chapter," Don McNair, August 10-21, $55. A publicist and author of five books, including an Eppie finalist, teaches you how to spot your manuscript's problems and, better yet, how to fix them. The topics include using strong hooks; turning info dumps into sparkling, vital prose; strengthening verbs; stripping away author intrusions; identifying crippling character filters; eliminating foggy phrases; correcting passive voice; and solving numerous other writing bugaboos. Bring along the completed first chapter of a work in progress that is ready to submit.

Writers Online Classes has two offerings in August.

• "Layering Your Scene One Element at a Time," Sherri Buerkle, August 1-31, $30. Have your characters or story ever been called flat? You can attain that elusive sparkle editors want by creating scenes that jump out at you. With writing conference favorite Sherri Buerkle's layering technique, you'll find that the right pace, vivid prose, emotion-filled scenes, and a stronger plot can be yours. Utilizing tons of writing examples, Sherri not only guide you through the process, but she will show you, step by step, what to do.
• "Happy Hooker: Engaging the Reader from Start to Finish," Terry Spear, August 1-31, $30. Slow starts and sleepy endings to scenes and chapters can ruin a manuscript's chance of being published. Conversely, solid hooks can make the sale, as Terry Spear, an award-winning author of urban fantasy and medieval historical romantic suspense, demonstrates. In this class, which features lectures, discussion, practical exercises, and handouts, Terry will teach students how to captivate readers with great openings, scene hooks, chapter cliff hangers, and intriguing back cover blurbs. Participants will master the hook in all its environments, from the query letter through the novel.

And finally, the RWA's Kiss of Death Chapter once again also has two classes lined up for August.

• "Homicide Investigation," a "Murder One" class, John Foxjohn, August 1-31, $15 for chapter members and $30 for nonmembers. A retired homicide detective explains the differences between and techniques of the interview and the interrogation. He also covers lineups; jurisdictions; the structures of police and sheriff's departments; custody or chain of evidence; television fallacies and how they relate to writing; the beginnings of a homicide investigation; the differences between large, medium, and small law enforcement departments; and the collection of evidence and processing of crime scenes.
• "Confict and Pacing," a "Killer Instinct" class, Alicia Rasley, $15 for chapter members and $30 for nonmembers. If you're looking for an in-depth exploration of conflict in fiction, this course is for you! Alicia Rasley, one of the most popular writing instructors around today, discusses using the character's internal motivation to create conflict; finding the right level of conflict for your story; organizing the plot to create rising conflict; modifying conflict to individualize scenes and characters; designing scenes for greater conflict; and heating up pacing with conflict turning points.

For a quick intro to online writing classes, click here. For additional information on the above classes and to register, click on the names of the venues and follow the links.

2000 Women

Last week, I went to the Romance Writers of America national conference in Washington, DC. I often find that when I need a kick in the pants, conferences are a good boost. Over the years, I've had the great good fortune to go to Crimebake, Sleuthfest, and the Edgars Symposium. But there's nothing like RWA. After all, where else do you find two thousand women (along with a few men) all in the same place, all striving toward the same goals that have nothing to do with weight loss, all helping each other?

Travel was somewhat difficult to organize because of the timing of the various things I wanted to be there for, and the least expensive option ended up putting me at the hotel at 9:30am on Wednesday morning, which meant getting up at 6am. At the registration desk the woman told me another conference was just checking out and that no rooms would be available until 3pm.

Ouch.

So...I sat in the lobby bar of the hotel with the several hundred (I kid you not) other women who were waiting for their rooms to be readied. I had never met these people before in my life, but that didn't matter. I found a chair with a group of women (you pretty much squeezed in wherever you could, given how many people were in the bar) and pretty soon everyone was critiquing pitches for each other, etc. Does it matter that I don't read time travel OR historical romance? Nope. I still helped a woman rewrite her pitch for a good half an hour. (I am proud and happy to say both people she pitched to requested it! I have no idea whether the book's any good, but her pitch is...pitch perfect.)

The workshops at RWA were on different "tracks": Career, Chat (with bestselling authors), Craft, Publishing, Research, Special (sessions with special speakers), Spotlight (on various publishing houses), and Writer's Life. At any given time, there were approximately ten sessions going on. When I went through the booklet, I realized that every single session I wanted to go to was a "Craft" session. Why? I don't know. Probably for the same reason I find books on writing and writing software so appealing. I don't need more information on publishing, or planning my career. I enjoy doing my own research and I know how to target different publishing houses. I keep up enough on industry news to know what to expect--and not to expect--from the business and a career as a writer.

Over at Dear Author, Jane says she "heard a number of complaints that the workshops were too rudimentary in terms of craft," but I didn't find that to be the case at all. Oh, sure, some were bad, but then some people just can't teach and some things cannot be taught. Maybe I just chose more carefully--or, more likely, more luckily--than the people she spoke to. I was on the trail of romantic suspense workshops, so I ended up sitting with the same people through several, and I know they also felt they'd gotten useful information.

I met several people from New York, convinced one or two to join Sisters in Crime, and was convinced, in turn, to join the local chapter of RWA. I met with my agent, which was interesting, and had a drink with a woman who is an auto-buy for me, which was fun.

And I totally destroyed my diet.

Step Right Up for a Chance to Win:

On Monday this week I reviewed best-selling British crime writer Martina Cole’s Faces. And I promised you a chance to win a brand spanking new copy of the just-released American edition of the novel. Now's your chance to read it before it hits the big screen - which it may well do just as several of her others have.

Grand Central Publishing, of the Hachette Book Group, is offering a copy of Faces to five lucky American or Canadian visitors to the Women of Mystery blog.

To win, add a comment to this post (click "Comments" below). Tell us about the last time you went after a goldfish or teddy bear at a county fair. Whether the game was a duck shoot or a tractor pull, tell us if you tried for a prize...if your big brother did...or if you stood by and drooled but never went for the big win. Never been to a county fair? There’s a story right there!

Leave me a word or two at this post and you’re in the game. Comments posted before noon on Tuesday, July 28 will be tossed in my salad bowl, and I’ve promised my neighbor’s kid he can do the draw.

If you're one of the lucky winners you'll hear from me the next day. Now it’s...one two three GO!

- Lois

Two Sentence Tuesday

It's that time again! Time to tell us what you're reading and writing. Someone asked me if twitter posts count. I guess if that's all you're reading and writing, they do. Myself, I don't twitter, so I don't know.

This week was all business (both the business of writing--more on that in a couple of days--and business business). Here's one of the things I read, which gives you an idea of the thrill level of what I managed to have time for:

The tax due date for the July 22, 2009 period end date is Monday, July 27, 2009.
For added convenience, ACH debit filers can use our ACH Debit web filing service, which provides the ability to warehouse your transaction.

And a couple I managed to get written:

Her disposable cell phone buzzed from inside her bag, indicating a text message. She dug it out and flipped it open.
ARE YOU ALONE IN THE DARK?

What about you? Did you read or write anything more exciting than tax forms? Let us know and we'll update this post with links to your own two sentences!

• Barbara Martin has given us two dark and mysterious sentences this week.
• Leah Utas has given us two giggle-worthy groundsel sentences this week.
  

Faces: Review and upcoming raffle

Best-selling British crime writer Martina Cole is adored by her readers, and here at Women of Mystery, we'd like to offer you a taste of her work. This week, Grand Central Publishing - part of the Hachette Book Group - will release the American edition of her novel Faces. Grand Central has offered us several copies to raffle off, so starting this Wednesday you'll get a chance to win one.

Set in London’s criminal underworld, the novel explores the rise and fall of a mobster. We are introduced, at the beginning, to fourteen year old “Danny Boy,” son of a weak-minded gambler who runs out on his family. Danny Boy must cope alone with the two punishing thugs who seek revenge in blood for his father’s gambling debt. Under the tutelage of a well-meaning gangster who takes the boy under his wing, Danny journeys from innocent self-defense to violence and finally notoriety as a mob’s ruthless kingpin.

Faces is a compelling but very tough read. Martina Cole's authentic voice propels us on an emotional ride. Sympathy for the abused boy. Horror at his first hideous kill a year later. Abhorrence of the psychopath he becomes. Danny Boy metes out mutilation, committing ghastly murders in order to frighten and so earn the respect he craves from his father, his family, and the thugs he rubs shoulders with.

I did find myself slowed down by frequent changes in character point-of-view and repetition. But when Cole breaks literary rules, it is as if she does so to underscore the rawness of these characters' lives.

The book is not for weak stomachs, so I’ll spare gentle readers the violence. Here’s an excerpt from chapter one, where we’re provided a window into the schoolroom where Danny Boy’s little brother is being "corrected" by a priest:

“The priest looked around the classroom, his arms outstretched in a gesture of complete innocence. He looked, for all the world, like a man interested in what a young fella might have to tell him. ‘I mean, child, if you have something to share with the rest of us mere fecking mortals, if you have some kind of fecking phone line to the Almighty Himself that we don’t know about, feel free to share your good fortune with those of us not deemed important enough to have the like ourselves.’”

A prolific writer, Cole sells by the millions in her native UK, where fans can’t get enough of her. Several of her books have been adopted for television dramas, and two for film.

The folks at Grand Central Publishing have allowed the Women of Mystery to give away five copies, so check back mid-week for the raffle.

- Lois

Enter to Win - Freelance Writing E-Course

The deadline's approaching quickly, but an opportunity exists for one lucky winner to receive free entry to veteran writer Linda Formichelli’s Premium E-Course, "Write for Magazines." (A special thanks to writer Erika Dreifus -- I read about it on her blog.)

Linda Formichelli is the co-author of The Renegade Writer.

The deadline to enter is Monday, July 20th. The winner will be announced July 21, 2009, on the Renegade Writer blog.

The eight-week course begins August 3, 2009.

In order to be considered in the random drawing, follow the directions set forth by Linda.

Good luck!

Friday Fun: Numerology of the Criminal Mullet

Buffalo Bill had one.

Today is 7/17, a day that warms the hearts (and necks) of mullet-wearers everywhere, since the number 7, in fact, conforms to the shape of a mullet. Coincidence? Only if rains of frogs are.

I'm not as pithy as our Nan, but here's a story from dumbcrooks.com, where the man was

solely identified by his personal style and, uh, odor.

A tenacious police dog and a telltale mullet haircut left no doubt among sheriff’s deputies in Kitsap County, Washington, that a 28-year-old South Kitsap man was the person who walked into a neighbor’s home uninvited...

A 22-year-old resident of Port Orchard dialed 911 just after midnight to report that “a man with a mullet” had entered his home uninvited and refused to leave, according to reports. The resident told deputies that he had invited some friends over to his new place along the 900 block of Retsil Road East. The man with a mullet, whose name was not released, and his friend walked up to the house with a case of beer and asked if they could party with them. The homeowner said no and the men left on foot.

Ten minutes later, the man with the mullet came back and forced his way into the home. He pushed the homeowner aside and went into the living room, trying to mingle with the people inside, reports state... When deputies arrived, they used a police dog to track the man’s scent. They found him sitting outside his home along the 2500 block of East Third Street...

If you're not familiar with the mullet, aka Tennessee Top Hat or Ape Drape, it exemplifies the "business in the front, party in the rear" lifestyle. Images come from Mullet Junky and Plague of the Mullet.

Though this international hairstyle sensation has also been associated with Columbian sicarios (hitmen), I'm showcasing the benevolent variety, such as musicmakers Diamond Rio and can-do hero MacGyver, to demonstrate it's never the mullet that's the trouble, but its irresponsible wielder.

Should you need detailed schematics, see this link or the chart below.

Thoughts on Research: Library Resources

In a previous post about research strategies to learn more about the people involved in the case of a half-century-old unsolved hatchet murder of a taxicab driver (the subject of my WIP - A Perfect Night for Murder), I mentioned using the SSDI. After obtaining a subject's date of death and last residence, I visited several libraries to search microfilms for obituaries and death notices.

The obituaries provided such details as occupations, hobbies, military history, former residences, and the name of surviving family members (I later contacted relatives and obtained further information). For many subjects, I only found very brief death notices.

A librarian at the Northport Public Library told me about their Oral History Collection (called Tracks Through Time), a project of recorded and transcribed interviews. The Chief of Police who handled the murder in 1955 was interviewed in 1962. The collection also included a 1998 interview with a long-term resident of East Northport, who employed the victim and found his body in the cab (although the murder is not discussed, it still provides insight into this important witness, whom I interviewed in 2002; she passed away in 2004).

One Saturday, I spent six hours at the Huntington Public Library reviewing microfilms of obituaries and articles. I was on a mission to locate details about an unrelated murder in 1957, in which the arrestee was later considered a suspect in the case. I found it -- but in the process, I stumbled across an article about a crime involving another suspect (one who was arrested seven years after the murder but eventually released) -- in which he was the victim of a hatchet attack and required emergency brain surgery (this information was not included in the police or news reports; I never would have known to look for it). It shed light on how this particular subject most likely became an unsuspecting victim of a bad game of Telephone (since the only evidence amounted to hearsay), and got charged with Murder First Degree as a result.

TY for the Books and Candy

Today is “Grandma gets to brag” day. My oldest grandson is six years old and finished kindergarten in early June. I recently received a letter from him. He wrote: “Dear Grandma” and then drew a heart. Inside the heart he wrote: “ty for the books and candy! I love you very much! please write back! Love, [Name]”

All spelling, capitalization and punctuation is exactly as written. Name has been omitted to shield him from hordes of fan mail.

After a while I guessed that “ty” meant “thank you.” When I checked with my daughter, she confirmed that the people in the “I still only have one digit” age group play lots of computer games and use short cuts similar to the ones adults use in text messages and IM messages, and on Twitter, etc.

I have spent far too much time fretting that all this short cut stuff was going to bring intelligent literary life to a grinding halt. I am going to stop worrying right now because my daughter told me that when grandson’s five year old sister looked over his shoulder and said “ty” doesn’t spell anything, he shouted at her, “It means thank you. You know, t-h-a-n-k-y-o-u.

And isn’t that how cultures decided the symbols for their written languages in the first place?

Terrie

Two For Tuesday - What Not To Write Edition

Under normal circumstances, I can find a few good sentences to give you folks for the day. But this has been an insane week, and I haven't had a chance to read much. Unfortunately, the book I did read was just ghastly. It was by a woman whose romances I used to read ages ago and really liked, so I thought I would give her a shot again. But rather than a delightful rediscovery, I got a true wallbanger. And towards the end, the author justifies the wallbangerness.

“Isn’t it a remarkable coincidence that you and I have both discovered unknown families? Random relatives returned from the dead? I don’t know what to think, apart from happy. But I feel as if I’ve wandered into a stage play.”

“The events haven’t really been random,” he said thoughtfully. “You and I were both removed from our proper places, you by your father, me by the all-powerful authorities. Through the efforts of your father and my stepfather, we have been restored to families that already existed. The timing is a bit coincidental, because it happened to both of us at almost the same time, but the events themselves are logical.”

Um, no. All I can say is if you have to write sentences like those to justify your book's overdone plot, you've lost me as a reader.

Not that my own sentences are going to be anything earth-shattering, you understand. I just feel...cheated...when I expend time and energy, not to mention money, reading something I have to assume has been vetted and approved by an agent and publisher, but I want to throw something when I am done.

That said, here are my own, non-earth-shattering sentences for this week:

Eric Allenby knew the woods, the hollows and caves, the pathways well-worn and barely discovered, the rocky outcroppings and fallen logs. He’d known the moment the intruders had taken over the tumble-down, rot-wood shack at the edge of the lake, and had considered chasing them off right away. But their impact on his business remained small, and he’d decided to bide his time. As so often, patience proved rewarding.

And you? Read anything fabulous or not-so-fabulous? Write anything?

Leah J. Utas read something tasty and wrote something...itchy!

Power of Language: D@mn3d Right and 5h*+ Yeah!

Image source here.

Since I'm usually writing for adults, I get to play with how much profanity to use and when. I want my written speech to be believable, but we've all stood in line next to foul-mouthed creatures who apply the same 5 curse words to every situation or person they encounter. Realistic, sure, but fascinating dialogue, it makes not.

I've also been polishing a crime story submission for an anthology to benefit a kids' cause. It's holiday-themed to appeal to benevolent, not necessarily noir-ish, readers. The editor would prefer submissions avoid the gutter talk. So, where's a logical point of balance? Maybe the doctors can decide. Medically, it turns out there may be appropriate, therapeutic instances for popping open a salty can of %$#@! Swearing makes you feel better!

...The study, published today in the journal NeuroReport, measured how long college students could keep their hands immersed in cold water. During the chilly exercise, they could repeat an expletive of their choice or chant a neutral word. When swearing, the 67 student volunteers reported less pain and on average endured about 40 seconds longer...

You always suspected it, didn't you?

How Do You Remember?

The weekend competition over at Schott's Vocabulary Miscellany was for Mnemonics. With 372 entries and counting, you'll surely find one for anything you might need to remember! Most of them were completely new to me. The only ones I remember from my own youth were Roy G. Biv and Every Good Boy Deserves Fun.

What about you? Any old favorites or soon-to-be classics?

Nailed It!

Weekends are for miscellany!

My favorite art isn't terribly message-y, rather it takes what's known and makes us see it in a different, beautiful way. Making art with hammer and nails surely qualifies.

My best friend forwarded thes pictures to me in an e-mail with an Arabic domain watermarked on the pictures, which just looks like a news service aggregator to me. But-- thank you internet commenters!-- I also found an admiring discussion thread containing the website home of incredible mosaic artist Saimir Strati, whose studio is apparently in Albania. In addition to this fine project, at his link, you may see galleries of his lovely, Guinness World record-holding mosaics in toothpicks and corks as well!

Friday Fun - July 10, 2009

Here's a quicky to start your day!

A policeman spots a woman driving and knitting at the same time. Driving up beside her, he shouts out the window... "Pull over!"

"No," she shouts back, "a pair of socks!"

Thaaaaat’s all, pals!

Thanks for the laughs, Uncle Jimmy!

(Thanks also to Thanks to http://www.angelfire.com/pa2/scanner/jokes/police/cops.html)

The Big TV

I didn't get married until I was thirty-nine years old, which meant I already had all those things younger couples need. I had plates and flatware, towels, sheets and cookware. Plus, my husband and I got married in Las Vegas, so there was no big wedding to plan...or pay for. Thus my father felt as if he should give us a big present but couldn't think of anything.

Frankly, neither could I. My husband, on the other hand, had an idea right off the bat. A big TV. Now, I'd never had anything like that. And the era of the tube TV was just ending, so suddenly you could put a lot more television in the same space. They didn't have the slimline thing they have now--you had to have two pieces, the screen, which was essentially a monitor, and the "guts", which came in a separate box and made the thing work as a TV. And they were ridiculously expensive.

But, okay, we asked for one. What seemed to me the most ridiculous luxury one could even imagine, a 37" television. And when we moved into our current house, my husband the carpenter built the cabinetry for our family room around the thing, so that it mounted on the wall and the box fit into a custom-made compartment in the cabinetry. (And god forbid you should have to plug anything new into it because that cabinet was built into a corner and the box was squeeeeeezed into the cabinet!)

Fast forward five years from us moving, and I come home to find my husband in the family room cursing because the TV has died. We can get it repaired, but not easily because we'll have to remove the screen from the wall and the box from the cabinet and haul them to the shop. We can have someone come to the house, but they'll charge us $150 for just the service call, not even for the repair...that's assuming they can repair it. And, of course, there'll be no warranty.

It doesn't take a genius (or a pair of them) to figure out we should buy a new one. After all, the technology is way better (no more two-part systems, better pictures) and way cheaper. So off we go to Best Buy and OMG who even knew how many options there were?

Now, here's the thing. I don't watch much TV. I listen to a lot of TV. I am frequently working on something while the television is on in the background (not writing, which I can't do that way, but anything for my computer consulting biz gets done on the couch), so realistically, I shouldn't be particularly invested in which one we chose. But I am. My husband has measured the space our old screen took it up (because it had speakers that hung on the sides, making it much wider than a normal 37" screen) and has decided we should get something a bit bigger since we have all that space.

I know, right? BIGGER. Mind blowing. So finally, we find the TV with all the things we want, but of course the Best Buy nearest our house--in Hartsdale, NY--where we're wandering the aisles doesn't have it in stock. The only one they have is on the wall. Never fear, they say, their system shows that the store a few miles down the road has it. So off we go to Yonkers, NY. Oops. The one the system showed they had was actually their display model, not a boxed one. But they can have one delivered for free...in eight days.

It's not as if we don't have a perfectly acceptable 15" television upstairs that we could bring down to the family room, but suddenly that's not good enough. Even for me, who watches television shows I've downloaded on my 13" computer screen when my husband is watching Ultimate Fighting on the actual TV. No, suddenly I want that big TV now.

Well, their store in Danbury, CT has one. So my husband drops me at home to take care of the dogs (who also care about what's on TV, as you can see below) and goes to CT to pick up the television. After which, I have to crawl inside the cabinet to take out the box from the old one. That's a task I am glad not to have to do again.

And now? Well, now I find that despite feeling as if I so rarely looked at the old television, even I can see how much nicer the new one is. Maybe my stories will get bigger now that I can see...well...the bigger picture. We'll see how the dogs feel about it.

Virtual Conventions?

Well, in this time of tightened belts and comparatively cheap electrons, perhaps it is an idea whose time has come. I'm certainly interested.

I heard (read) about Poisoned Pen's Mystery Fanfare Webcon, scheduled for October 24th, from the eminent Bill Crider, who pointed to the source for even more info here. From their website:

Guest of Honor: Dana Stabenow; International Guest of Honor: Lee Child; Fan Guest of Honor: Adrian Muller.

Panels and Discussions: Groups of authors discuss and debate various topics. Live events and presentations and 'on demand' recordings. Video, Audio and Text based panels, debates and discussions on topics related to mystery and crime writing, featuring authors from all over the world. There's even a coffee shop to meet authors and others, and chat with them live.

They're still filling up the program information, but what do you think in general? Obviously, the handshaking and accidental bumping-into-people will be limited, but perhaps it offers enough content plus convenience to make up for it? The price at $25, profit going to libraries, is quite reasonable. I confess that I do like the idea of an conference I can wear my pajamas to.

Who am I kidding- I'd wear them to regular conventions, too. I'll be the one in the virtual bar with the matching shirt and pants.


Image source here.

Tuesday Twosome: Terrie Triumphs!

Hopefully, this is a suitably spooky picture of Larchmont's fireworks.

I have mentioned on other Tuesdays that the next MWA anthology, to be published in 2010, has the supernatural-plus-crime as its nifty subject and is being edited by the doyenne of the drainers, Charlaine Harris. Well, guess what two sentences just rolled into the Women of Mystery's inbox?

I am very surprised that I can announce to you that my story, "The Awareness" was accepted for inclusion in the MWA anthology. I almost missed the boat entirely since the email wound up in my spam folder for a couple of days...

This was from our own Terrie Farley Moran, whom we congratulate with a giant banshee moan for doing us all so proud! Next April, we will all be buying copies of what's tentatively entitled Blood Lust!

Among ones I wrote this week: "You take notes while I get the milk. So, when Little Tony cut up the telephone lines for extra overtime before Christmas, Big Tony would pull a frozen squirrel out of the repair truck..."

What 2 wonderfully well-deserved sentences have you read/written this week? Add them to the comments, or let us know where to find them. Just one more thing. Yay again!!!!!

UPDATE: David Cranmer pulls more snowy ones from his Sherpa hat.
Leah J. Utas offers a bizarre prohibition that made me want to soap up, too.
Scott D. Parker puts a Houston cop in a loaded situation.

My Town Monday

Hither Hills State Park                             MONTAUK

I have a thing about tents. I've never been able to sleep in one. I suddenly get a condition called 'restless legs' whenever I try, and end up waking up every 15 minutes.  The last time I went camping I swore I'd never do it again. That was over a decade ago.

But I decided this May to give it another try because of Montauk's seductive  Hither Hills Campgrounds, which is on Old Montauk Highway about 3 hours from NYC. The very popular place had always caught my eye whenever my husband and I drove by it on our way into town to stay at a hotel.

Hither Hills is a state park at the far eastern end of Long Island with camping grounds right off the beach. At some higher sites you can even see the ocean from your tent.

Montauk beach itself is 32 miles long with gorgeous, smooth white sand that is a quarter-mile-wide with beautiful sunsets and sunrises.

The park allows 2 tents, 6 people and 1 car to be on each reserved site. Many of the sites have a picnic table on a cement slab. Bathrooms are never very far. 

My husband bought us a pretty good size tent that we both could stand up in and it felt nice and roomy in the day time (slide please) so we thought I stood a chance this time, but when I went to  'sleep' that night I had to move as close to the tent door as I could, because surprise, surprise, I felt trapped.

This meant leaving my husband alone on the blow up bed and taking my sleeping bag to lie on the ground with my nose as close to the front door zipper as I could get it so I could occasionally unzip the door to see the outside.  Am I a city girl or what?  Like the sky was going to disappear?

A half-hour later and still awake I heard two animals fighting right outside our tent. It was a mean, vicious fight in which some smaller critter definitely met his/her end with a shriek and a crunch.  I got to tell you I was so terrified I shot up from the ground and went back to that mattress so fast, I must have broken some kind of world record somewhere. And fell asleep. (knowing I was safer in the tent?) I don't know. I just hope I am forever cured so I can go back.  

It was great getting up in the morning and going right down to the beach and having it all that magnificent space all to myself. And I loved eating breakfast outside on our own private picnic table, looking up at the sky and hearing the sound of the ocean. 

A little information about the 168-site campground:

It has a sweet playground that's on sand, (kids can also bike around on the road that loops around the grounds), great scenic picnic areas in the hills, 4 very nice public bathrooms that are very clean with a lot of private showers and great hot water pressure, a snack bar, a camp store, vending machines, and a dump station. I was very impressed that the park maintains a large recycling program and that there is a no noise after 10pm rule which is strictly enforced.

Information I grabbed from various websites:

Organized recreation program in high season includes family movies, folk & line dancing, children's summer theater, magic shows and various environmental interpretation programs. Additional facilities include playground, ball field, 10 acre scenic picnic area with fireplaces, horseshoe courts, volleyball, tether ball and hiking trails. Phones are centrally located, and the park is patrolled by New York State Park Police.

Hither Hills State Park also offers sport fishing. Anglers can fish year-round and obtain permits to fish at night. The unique "walking dunes" of Napeague Harbor are located on the eastern boundary of the park, which also has woodlands filled with Russian olive, oak, shad and pine trees. Bridle paths and hiking, nature, biking and cross-country ski trails are available.

There's also a 40 acre freshwater lake.

Seasons/Hours:

Park is open year round, 7 days a week, sunrise to sunset. Campsites are available from early April to mid-November. Big game and small game hunting are permitted during season.www.lirv.com/camps/hither.htm

The new site for My Town Monday links is : mytownmonday.blogspot.com