This week, my sister-in-law's book, Something New: Wedding Etiquette for Rule Breakers, Traditionalists, and Everyone In Between, came out. It's non-fiction, so widely--and wildly--different from my own area that discussing its genesis has been absolutely fascinating to me.
(As to the title of this post--I know plenty of people with book contracts and published books...I'm just not one yet. And on the topic of being the "bride," of having the book contract, etc, a salutary if somewhat depressing post from Kate Flora.)
Elise's book is about weddings. And in it, she answers questions I wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole. What to do about that guy you don't want to invite, but you know someone else is going to bring? What to do with the "threesomes" you know? How to tell your father you don't want him to walk you down the aisle? What to say when you hate your friends fiancée?
I was 39 when I married my husband, who was 42. We got married in Las Vegas because he was working there at the time. We invited...no one. Later, we had a big party. I knew I didn't want a big to do, but until I started looking into this book, I didn't realize just how many sticky situations we'd avoided doing things the way we did.
Of course, being a mystery writer, the information in this book (inevitably) inspired murderous thoughts. My goodness, I begin to understand why so many cozy mystery series revolve around wedding planners, etc. Mothers of the groom who wear wedding dresses to the wedding, the "dry" family vs. the "drinking" family, cash games at weddings (and showers), mislaid invitations, "destination" weddings...so many potential causes of felonious activity!
This book also includes a very nice acknowledgment from my sister-in-law, who appears to feel she owes me thanks for listening to her "electronic rants." If that's true, the acknowledgment section of my own book is going to be long, indeed. In fact, it will probably have to include every regular reader of this blog!
Elise's website is still in development, so there's not much there yet. She maintains a blog at IndieBride, where she posts about the life and times of an urban mom.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Always A Bridesmaid
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4 comments:
Please give your SIL my congrats! And tell her to get that website up NOW, especially if the address is included in the book. I'm sure I'm not alone in looking up authors' websites as soon as I get their books home.
Like you, Laura, I didn't have a big wedding. Gary and I were 22 when we got married, but we did it in a hurry. We'd known each other for five years plus dated during our senior year in college, but we went our separate ways after graduation. Then Gary quit his out-of-state job and came home to look for a new one, and we started dating again. When he was offered a new job, again out of state, we decided to get married before he had to report for work. The ceremony was in a chapel and the party was small and in my backyard, and there have been many, many times over the years that I've thanked the gods for allowing us to avoid the stress, problems, and "uncomfortable situations" I've watched my friends and colleagues deal with. (And let's not even mention the money!) Now that everyone I know is married (some for a second time), I guess your SIL's book would be good to have on hand for those times I need a booster shot of gratefulness!
Much luck and many hoorays to your sister-in-law!
We did have a more traditional wedding with tuxes and flowers for 150, but only after dating so long that more people said Finally than Congratulations. We chose some non-traditional things like having a magician, tarot reader, and blackjack table with a jazz combo among the reception rooms and actually letting people snack and drink before the ceremony. We had everything at a Chicago mansion where we rented the entire building and staged different parts of the evening in different rooms and let the guests wander as they wished. There were a couple stressors in the planning, but not too many and none very distracting.
Once you lose the (weird, to me) notion of Perfection and become unwilling to let any one detail Ruin your fun, it's a breeze. Maybe because we were both past 30 and paying for such a chunk, everyone was nice and flexible and grateful just to come to a good party. Make that 3 WoM (and counting?) as satisfied nuptial customers. And for everyone still deciding, your SIL's book is conveniently available!
So the WoM seems to be a group of nontraditionalists. How, um, surprising. :)
Said Elaine: So the WoM seems to be a group of nontraditionalists. How, um, surprising.
Oh, yes, terribly surprising! ::snicker::
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