Worst Short Story Evah?

Author J.A. Konrath is judging a short story contest, and he's written a sample entry collecting the most common errors he's seeing. I found it a scream, if only because the funniest things are also true. I know lots of the Great Unwashed and Unpublished class of writers like me who are working hard at becoming better craftspeople and storytellers. I've also met plenty in our class who swear their work is flawless and that it's the industry conspiring to stifle their greatness. Most of the latter artistry reads like this, and they all want introductions to my agent:

It was a very sunny day in the spring of 2004 in fact it was so sunny, that even the sun had to wear sunglasses! It was on this very sunny day that I first met my wife. Her name was Rhoda, and she loved life. She lived in a house at 8786 Cranberry road, with her mother and three dogs named Sharpie, Bull, and Doxie, who are a Sharpei, a bulldog, and a doxhund. Boy were those dogs trouble! Yes they were! Trouble spelled T-R-O-U-B-L-E with a capitol T! But Rhonda loved those dogs, so much, that I never would have guessed, how it all ended up. And, boy, did it end up, bad! On a very cloudy day in the fall of 2006, Rhonda took the dogs out for a walk, but you can actually say that they walked her. Those were some frisky dogs! As they all walk to my house, Sharpie sniffe d out a skunk and got squirted, which smelled even worse. Sharpe thought it was a cat, but he sure was surprised! When Rhonda brought the dogs into my house, boy was I ever really very upset.

Read the rest of the brief jewel-like tale here at Joe's blog. The more you read, the more trouble you'll find. And if you have any of these occasional uh-ohs lurking in your own work, well, be very ashamed and get to editing. That's what I'm doing.